When I began this blog 5 years ago I never thought it would become a platform for my healing journey. I certainly didn't think it would become what it is today, which is a connection to my healing while allowing connection to others.
When I began writing my blog 5 years ago it was testing the waters of what was to come, and each day I shared a little more, and a little more, and before I knew it, I was telling my story.
It's not easy to be open, it comes with its risks and vulnerability, but what I realized the most is how connecting it can be, and how many others I have connected with around sharing the very things they others were struggling with.
Giving voice and sharing a painful past is not easy, and it takes trust within yourself to be open and vulnerable. The moment you put yourself out there, your heard and seen and sometimes that can be scary - until you realize that by sharing your story, others out there share and have the same story.
I am a survivor of child sexual abuse, a mom, a wife, a friend, a child of god .. and I am still healing!
I have PTSD and suffer from triggers .. but that doesn't define me.
I live from day to day moving through the many results of this .... but I never give up!
I have met some incredible people through my writing; other people who have the same hurts and the same pain that I hold, that I am healing. I have met some people who walk the same path as me, and that helps me to feel less alone on this journey.
As with anything in life it also came with it's struggles as well.
I faced some really hard moments with sharing my story and putting myself out there to be seen - literally. I have paid some consequences for writing my truth and letting myself be seen - and I am still healing those wounds that were created because of that, but the thing is - it didn't stop me! I am still here, writing, healing, being, using my voice to overcome and go above and beyond the old messages.
I may have struggled with some hard consequences of having my blog and using my voice, but those struggles have only made me stronger, write bigger, and use my voice louder!
One of the many blessings of writing through my blog is sharing my writings in therapy sessions with my therapist - because not only am I using my voice to connect with others, but it creates a connection to where I can see my own struggles and share those struggles in the very room I am most vulnerable to my healing.
I look at how far my blog has come, and with all its struggles I am still here writing through them! Sharing my story and being a part of this community of healers is a god given gift and every day I have the ability to use that gift.
Everytime I sit down to write, I hope that it touches one person who struggles to give voice to the pain or the secrets held. I hope that I can inspire someone, or to at least know that "you are not alone". . . you are connected to others who also share the same hurts and the same struggles.
I feel God has given me a gift to touch and be in connection with others and that is what inspires me to write and share my story!
I am blessed that I have that ability every day, even with my own struggles that this blog comes with. Not all great things are easy, but it certainly is worth every thought and every bit of healing it creates in me.
Stand tall and share your story . . . . even if you start off small, every bit of your voice counts!